brometheus: (pic#11216383)
dirk strider ([personal profile] brometheus) wrote in [community profile] dear_player2017-04-19 04:23 am

[community profile] soulgemmed has had a crazy few months.

I should have known that this is was the logical conclusion. There was no happy ending in store for us, but the detonation of that bomb took out more than anticipated.
No amount of platitudes or empty reassurances will ease anything. Stick a fork in it, the unity of the team is fucking done.
Even saying that, I don't regret making the wish. I do wish that I'd been more careful about what I used it on.
These powers aren't enough to do anything.
And I can't say for certain whether or not this is better or worse than where I was before...
Probably worse.
If only for the fact that enduring this alone is eventually going to drive me up the fucking wall.
I can't confide in Dave or anyone there, they have enough on their plate.
I can't confide in myself, because we are not the same fucking guy and I was stupid to assume superficial similarities were indicative of nature overcoming nurture. Correlation does not equal causation.
This is going to require a serious overhaul of my plans. Nothing to do now but improvise.
eatdavesbabies: (What the hell)

[personal profile] eatdavesbabies 2017-04-19 07:49 am (UTC)(link)
You could make your plans 'stick to my own'.

Like I've been fucking telling you.

Good to know you are just right the fuck impervious to sage advice.
eatdavesbabies: (Gotta get good)

[personal profile] eatdavesbabies 2017-04-19 07:52 am (UTC)(link)
Wanted to see what kind of dudes you were surrounding yourself with.

Sure you want to hang around with dudes who are apparently cool with folks who are on a shit list just running around without beat asses?
eatdavesbabies: Found at smuppeteering (Fuck is all this)

[personal profile] eatdavesbabies 2017-04-19 07:59 am (UTC)(link)
So enlighten me. Dig up some of your genius and just anoint me with that shit.

You want to tell me how you were going to control any of these motherfuckers without physical force? Two of them are downright psychotic. They aren't gonna give much of a fuck about social constructs or contracts that you could use to control them.

I expected him to either give me info about the bitches you jotted down for me or I expected him to get pissy. Guess I know where he landed on that.
Edited 2017-04-19 08:00 (UTC)
eatdavesbabies: (That a fucking fact)

[personal profile] eatdavesbabies 2017-04-19 08:14 am (UTC)(link)
Actually? Yeah. I do think you'd be that stupid. Really, that is you haven't told him everything, just like you haven't told me everything.

Because lets be honest, you're not going to tell anyone everything you're thinking. Not even yourself. And sometimes that's just because you don't fucking know. You're going to shatter that trust eventually. You were just lucky enough it wasn't through me.

Apparently, I just did not fucking make myself clear the first time we talked on this matter. I didn't lay the issues just flat fucking straight on the table so everyone could get a good read. So let me do that now.

I do not give. A single fuck. About anyone in this town. Anyone who isn't a Strider isn't quantifiable to me, and I don't go around trying to figure that shit out. I just get rid of it if it ever has a chance of threatening my interests.

You understand that? Your little weakness and collaring gambit is cute for a game, but it's some pre-k bullshit from where I'm standing. I don't give a fuck who these people are, if they're some psycho who thinks he's a scene kid or a crazy bitch demon selling chocolate or some fat kid who has emotional issues and fucks everything up or some bitch stealing mall food, I do not give a fuck.

When it comes down to that last mile where it's a choice between my bro and I and them, and it will come down to that choice, there shouldn't be a question what my fucking decision is.
splinten: 5watt-litebulb @ tumblr (to wonder about it)

[personal profile] splinten 2017-04-19 07:53 am (UTC)(link)
Fully cognizant of the ethical and interpersonal complications of this, and not at all ignoring the metaludological impracticalities, I'm going to put the suggestion out there anyway:
Just rip that motherfucker's soul out. It ain't like he's usin' it for fraternal affection and support here. No one will notice a damn thing missing.
splinten: chaos7 @ tumblr (shit. lets be santa)

[personal profile] splinten 2017-04-19 08:03 am (UTC)(link)
Exactly what percentage of a problem is that?
Powercaps are their own particular brand of bullshit, but in the frame of ready-made ways to end a threat to my brother, a tangible object for the taking is good enough for me.
splinten: (and play all these games)

[personal profile] splinten 2017-04-19 08:28 am (UTC)(link)
Ok, so that does count as a major complication.
How is Dave?
splinten: ikimaru @ tumblr (A CLOSTER INSPECTION →)

[personal profile] splinten 2017-04-19 08:37 am (UTC)(link)
Consistently denying anything is wrong? Awesome.
Did he ever talk to you about his Bro before?
splinten: ikimaru @ tumblr (A CLOSTER INSPECTION →)

[personal profile] splinten 2017-04-19 09:02 am (UTC)(link)
Does he trust you?
Setting aside all of the instinctive self-loathing and our well-founded confidence that he really shouldn't. Which is a miraculous feat in itself. It's like we're lifting up the car that fell on our infant child, temporary superheroes before the inevitable medical bills ruin our financial ability to support the family. We're going to lose the home and the kids are never going to make it to college but like Hell are we going to let them die before they have the chance to be disillusioned by the self-destructive ruthlessness of contemporary America.
Does he trust you more than he trusts his Bro?
splinten: tertian @ tumblr (out of me)

[personal profile] splinten 2017-04-19 09:34 am (UTC)(link)
It figures that I managed to fuck myself over in multiple directions. That is some quality Classic Strider knot of Gordian constructions. And the sword is not an option.
You have to know what's necessary. You can't protect him from this if you can't be more of a brother to him than this douchebag source code for our existence.
Not protecting him isn't an option.
splinten: madragingven @ tumblr (give whatever thing you made it)

[personal profile] splinten 2017-04-19 10:24 am (UTC)(link)
It takes more than that, dude.
Do you think you aren't dealing with a complex trauma here? He was abused. We were the dude who abused him. He spent thirteen years convincing himself and everyone else that it was totally ok.
Even getting Dave to see what he is is just a half-step on an infinite staircase and you had better believe I'm warning you about them. Breaking that monster down isn't going to cut it. You need to be ready to deal with all the complications that come from this.
lapidarius: <user name="diabolism666" site="tumblr.com"> (racing the setting sun)

[personal profile] lapidarius 2017-04-19 04:26 pm (UTC)(link)
I have to discard any shred of optimism I ever had and admit that 'unity' was never realistically on the table.

I think the modern term for what we are is 'clusterfuck', or something to that degree.

If we can't confide in the few people that are still trustworthy and reasonably sane, we're just going to end up even worse off than we are now.
Edited (i swear to god, i know how to type.) 2017-04-19 16:27 (UTC)